How to Be Resilient When Life Keeps Kicking You in the Teeth
Because apparently trauma is just a character-building side quest.
Everyone’s searching “how to be resilient” like it’s a personality trait you can download. Here’s the unfuckable truth.
Resilience isn’t bouncing back. It’s not some rubber-band metaphor where you return to your original shape. Fuck that. Resilience is bouncing forward with a limp and a grudge. You don’t “get over” trauma — you integrate it, weaponize it, and use it as fuel. The person who went through hell and came out soft and wise is a myth. The real ones came out sharp and slightly dangerous.
Here’s the satirical truth: The “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” people have never been killed by anything. They’re quoting Nietzsche from their comfortable apartments while you’re over here actually surviving. You’re not stronger. You’re just still here. And that’s enough. That’s the whole point. Strength is overrated. Persistence is underrated.
I lost my house. My mom. My daughter. My artwork. Everything. Then I rebuilt from $20 in my son’s living room using a manifesto I wrote because I couldn’t stomach one more self-help book from someone who’s never lost anything real. That’s not resilience. That’s desperation with a business plan. And it worked. Not because I’m special. Because I didn’t have another option. Sometimes resilience is just “well, this is happening, so I guess I’ll keep moving.”
The self-help industrial complex wants you to journal your feelings and find the lesson. I say find the lesson, then burn the journal. The past is data. Not destiny. You don’t need to be grateful for the trauma. You just need to be done letting it steer.
The Unfuckable 5 (Eccentric Edition):
1. Name the beast. Write down exactly what happened. Specifics. Not “bad stuff.” The actual shit. Then fold it into a paper airplane and throw it at a wall. Physics helps psychology.
2. Find the lesson (even if it’s “people suck”). Every disaster teaches something. Sometimes it’s just “trust your gut next time.” That’s valid data. File it.
3. Build your “fuck you” fund. Even $5/week. Financial cushion equals psychological cushion. It’s not about the money. It’s about the option.
4. Create a resilience resume. List every hard thing you’ve survived. Read it when you feel weak. You’ve done this before. You’re doing it now.
5. Help one person. Share your story with someone going through it. Turns your pain into purpose. Also makes you feel less alone. Win-win.
Today’s Fuckcabulary Word: Fucksilience
Fucksilience — Fuck + Resilience = The ability to endure catastrophic failure while maintaining enough attitude to rebuild with a middle finger raised.
The Daily Fuckcabulary — presented by Unfuckable, Inc.
For more unfuckable strategies: unfuckable.co
©️Hawsé Sumi